i chose beer tonight over seroquel..and i feel like shit. i don’t do the beer thing often, maybe once a month. but i always feel like crappola and i never learn.  i’m scared shitless to just take the seroquel like normal. the last time i did that i ended up hugging the toilet at the pub. passed out…no clue what the fuck was going on.

on another note, tomorrow is pay day, and it’s the holidays so i have to do some shopping. i always feel super happy and energized on paydays. and i always spend frivelously..i still don’t have a savings to speak of. and i’m still paying minimum monthly payments.

i’m still doubting the dosage is right, or even the  diagnosis..i don’t feel better..not even a little bit..well i do…but only when i’m spending money.

since my shrink flipped a lid, i’m really “iffy” about seeing someone else. even though i know it’s crucial that i do. i feel like i’m slipping.